Childs View

Separation and Divorce Through a Child’s View


Your child might experience the following feelings and thoughts:

Fear: A child might wonder, “Will you leave me too?”
Guilt: A child might think, “Is this my fault?”
Sadness: A child might not say, “I miss (the other parent).”
Anger: A child might think, “Look at what you have done to my family.”
Confused: A child might wonder, "What does this mean for my family?" "How do we do this?"

"Will I still be able to play soccer?" "Will I see (the other parent)?" "Who will take care of me?"

"Where will I live?" "Who do I see on the holidays?"

What Can Parents Do To Help Children Adjust?.

  1. Encourage communication! Allow your child to ask questions and express feelings.
  2. Develop a daily routine. Routines will help your child to adjust because he or she will know what to expect.
  3. Keep verbal communication about the other parent positive.
  4. Avoid communicating to the other parent through your child. Parents should communicate with each other in regards to the parenting schedule or activities.
  5. Maintain the same rules and expectations.  
  6. Model healthy coping skills for your child. Do activities you both enjoy.

What Can Counseling Do?

  • Provide a warm, friendly, nonjudgmental environment to share feelings and concerns.
  • Utilize play to foster communication and challenge irrational beliefs.
  • Help discover new ways to adjust and move forward.

Separation and divorce is never easy for children or adults. It’s a time of pain, sadness, and anger. Your family doesn’t have to face this difficult time alone.

If you are in a domestic abuse relationship, safety for you and your child(ren) is your first priority. You can find further information at these sites:
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence:

For other parenting tips, please visit my Parenting Blog.

Donna Bivona
3170 N. Federal Highway Suite 211-I
Lighthouse Point, Florida 33064
(954) 830-8588